if you can figure out how to apply to law school, then i think you should automatically be given a degree.

this past weekend, i began to compile my list of schools-i-can't-get-into, and i am for the first time in years, completely overwhelmed to the point of immobility. (hence the lack of blogging.)

for those of you who were once privy to my anal retentiveness, you'll appreciate that instead of working on applications, i bought a notebook and designated exactly 5 pages for each school i'm planning on applying to. each school is then marked by a post-it note tab that is color-coded by "low reach school," "mid-reach school," and "who-the-fuck-am-i-kidding? school." i then printed out each school's application process for its jd/mba program and highlighted the important details. then i took notes on all application deadlines, number of letters of recommendation accepted, accepted length for personal statement, and contact information in case i have questions.

when i had finished that, i decided that i would just whip out a personal statement while i was at it.

i then proceeded to have a meltdown.

law schools want to hear what i plan to do with a jd, but in future projections, i have no ambition to actually practice law. business schools want to hear what i plan to do with an mba, and although i'm imbued with a sense of entrepreneurship (probably a mix of my father's genes and the 5+ years of my ex-boyfriend's rants), i can't predict how i'm going to get my fingers into business.

plan b. write about what i want to do with my life. as per evidence of this blog, i have no fucking clue.

plan c. write about what i've done and how that has helped me decide to pursue these degrees. how the hell am i going to convince law schools and business schools to accept me into the most ball-busting program that produces the biggest corporate ball-busters when all i've done my whole life has been in the feel-good non-profit world? i can't tell them that i want a prestigious dual degree that produces corporate counsels and CEOs so i can go plan some israel programs for some non-profit organization.

plan d. write about significant experiences that have shaped my identity and why i'm unique. i'm a white, jewish (hispanic) girl. i grew up in an affluent neighborhood. i attended a private day school, a private middle school, a private high school, and a private college. growing up, my concept of struggle was how i was going to get to three bar mitzvahs on the same night. my sense of poverty and world hunger came from doing projects once a year on my synagogues "mitzvah day" (for the non-jews, that's a day when the synagogue sets up a bunch of social justice projects for their congregants to attend ... if they feel like it). i know i'm a kick-ass student who would love the 4 years of education boot camp, and i know i'm a good person, but given my experiences, no one would believe me.

plan e. make up some bullshit. learn the "grad school acceptance" prayer.