last night i dreamed about corned beef and dave nograti.

the night before, i dreamed that my college sorority enthusiastically kicked me out.

these dreams are indicative of one of two issues: 1) my recent move to cambridge has left me yearning for some sense of comfort, reassurance, and attachment to the familiar; or 2) my recent late night indigestion is causing me to have nightmares.

for the first time in my life, i'm living alone. that is, if having two males follow me around the apartment, purr on command, and spoon at night constitutes being alone. come to think of it, it's really just one male short from my last living arrangement.

i'm not sure if falling asleep and waking up alone this week is my first taste of stimulating autonomy or heart-breaking loneliness. either way, i must admit that finally being at a destination, however permanent or flippant, is a welcomed change from perpetual transition.

for all intensive porpoises (or "intents and purposes" as the expression supposedly goes despite the fact that i thought it was the former for the first 23 years of my life), i've been in moving mode for the last three weeks, and here's what i have to report: it sucks. packing sucks. dealing with movers sucks. negotiating with building managers sucks. living out of a duffle sucks. loading and unloading the car sucks. unpacking sucks. lifting and shoving and pushing and bending sucks.

and sitting in the car with two whining cats for ten hours really really sucks.

(a sucking that can only be temporarily relieved by the ingestion of a big mac and two large fries. unfortunately, there were no pound cakes available for take-out in connecticut or i probably would have eaten that too.)

i'm the only 24 year-old i know whose mom flies around the country in order to accompany her daughter's drive from one infatuation to another. actually, i'm also the 24 year-old i know who has a charted national cracker barrel restaurant map in her car so that she and previously said passenger can plan road trips around eating breakfast, lunch and dinner at said restaurant. i'm not sure if the cravings for grits and biscuits are a tribute to the nineteen (mostly) southern states my mom and i have driven through over the last few years (who would have guessed that west virginia is beautiful and that radar detectors -- even those bought in paduka, kentucky -- are illegal in virginia) or a retribution to the arroz con pollo and metropolitan fare i grew up with in miami.

whatever the case, nothing brings a mother and daughter together like the sunrise sampler (over-easy and 86 the gravy).

so now that i have a tenth floor apartment with a spectacular view of the charles river and fenway park, i guess that means i really have to go to grad school. remind me why i'm paying some institution make me feel like a screw up rather than working for an organization that will at pay me to screw up?

oh right. so i have new things to make fun of.

so i have lived in cambridge for less than 4 days and have already identified the first uber-nerdy characteristic of this town: smart-tv. smart-tv is a channel dedicated to broadcasting local spelling bees, messages from local high-schoolers to each other ("hey! if you're in ms. simon's class, the homework for tomorrow is to read chapters 12-36 and answer all the questions at the end of every lesson!"), and the shows that aren't interesting enough to make it to the history channel.

that's what i've heard anyway. it's not like i watched it all afternoon. (liar.)

and i definitely didn't hang out at the love potion number 9 block party in central square this evening that included old people dancing and little kids running around looking for their mit/harvard professor parents. (liar.) where are my motorcades and counter-terrorist units that i loved so much in washington dc? am i in friggen pleasantville?!

if this is what i'm in for, i think i prefer the corned beef nightmares.